Like a sudden road closure, I feel disoriented and lost at times. My productivity gets completely blocked and the way forward feels complicated. Here are 5 relatable ways I get stuck.
What stops me from being productive?
I have a list of areas where I often get stuck and completely blocked. Like a sudden road closure, I feel disoriented and lost. Some are just life-related and others are unhealthy patterns I am trying to work through.
By putting these to words maybe you will find similarities from your life. Know that you are not alone.
We can get through this and get unstuck together. 🩵
We all have times of discouragement and frustration. We all have areas that stop us from moving forward.
Here are a few of mine….
#1 The opinions of others
For me, being stuck by others opinions looks like:
- Becoming short-tempered and feeling defeated.
- Second-guessing myself…. (and third guessing… and fourth.. Is that a thing? I have done it!)
- Overthinking everything! What they will do or say, what will happen, how it will look to others.
- Not doing what my family needs because I am spending time and energy on others outside of my home.
- Feeling invisible, underappreciated, and unseen.
What is true? What can I change? I am not responsible for the harsh opinions or emotional health of other adults. No matter how someone is related to me, or what role they play in my life. That person’s expectations and opinions do not belong to me. It is not my job to make other people happy or feel content. It is my job to be kind, to love them well, and to make boundaries for myself and my family.
#2 Life is messy.
Kids are messy creatures. Farm animals are a lot of work. Having a home with space also means that I have to clean those spaces. The bathrooms are never “fully clean” and the laundry piles up in the baskets no matter how much folding I did today. Eating good meals makes the kitchen a mess several times a day. Hosting people at my house takes prep work ahead of time, meal planning, and clean up after. Much of what I do is an invisible investment. Most of homemaking and being a mom is doing the things that no one sees.
What is true? What can I change? Living a vibrant life full of creativity and people is messy. Without the mess, we would be alone and hurting in new ways. Living a life alone in a perfectly clean house is not something I want either. I want to have kids who enjoy cooking, who make art for fun, and a vibrant family life that someday brings them back home for the holidays. I can put systems in place that help me.
#3 Parenting struggles
Kids throw tantrums. Kids and teens push boundaries. Kids get sick and have a grumpy day. As parents we have a lot to learn very quickly. Navigating the use of technology, late-night Google searches when the baby won’t stop crying, teaching a teenager how to drive, teaching life skills that they will need, and figuring out what social needs work best for each child.
There are some parenting stages that are super intense and overwhelming. Such as: potty training, teaching littles chores, changing routines, dealing with lying, teaching determination, messy social situations, learning limits, teaching my teen time management… the list is very long. These are just a few off the top of my head. Also, tiny humans are hard.
What is true? What can I change? Each parenting stage is an opportunity for growth and connection. There are constantly new stages of development that my kids are going through. And as a parent, I have to adapt and learn what is working best right now. That takes energy and time. As my oldest grows my learning curve is just as steep as hers. I am learning how to juggle all the things too. I can start our day with kindness and focus on relationships.
#4 Not having support.
Friendships are difficult. Family relationships can be complicated. Sometimes I get bogged down with social media and digital communication. That can look like:
- Over-explaining myself so that I will get approval from someone who is critical and never happy anyway.
- Waiting, until I have approval from other people, to do something that I know is best for me .
- Being overwhelmed by people who have strong opposing opinions, ideas and plans (or lack of plans).
- Being misunderstood in a text message or a group chat.
What is true? What can I change? Loving other people can often be uncomfortable and hard. I am messy, not perfect, and difficult too. We all need to give each other a large measure of grace and kindness. Seeing some situations as unhealthy and emotionally demanding is super helpful. Removing myself from the drama of others is vital to my personal sanity and growth.
Also, I can choose when I am available to others. The internet makes so much information and so many relationships available to us at all times of the day. I can lay in bed and check email, scroll social media, and text. Would I do those things if the person was standing in front of me having a real-life conversation? NO! So I choose not to.
#5 My Expectations
Things did not turn out like I wanted. I had a plan. I was expecting a specific result.
- I did all the right things and it did not turn out like the parenting book said it would.
- I created the project but it looks more like a Pinterest fail than a post that someone would put online.
- I completed the difficult phonics curriculum but my child still struggles with spelling (and so do I).
- I worked all afternoon in the heat and there are still a million thorny weeds growing in the back yard.
- I said all the right things and she still yelled at me and called me names.
- I did my best and that mom group will not invite me to their events.
What is true? What can I change? We all have an idea in our heads that certain actions or words should create a result. I often expect a specific outcome when having a conversation with someone. I forget to allow the other person space to react in their own way. I see my very narrow view of how things should go. I forget to look up and give space to others with different perspectives and ideas.
I have to learn the same lessons again and again. I am stubborn and I forget. I have to be reminded that I need My Creator and that He has made me for a reason. That what I do matters even if it does not happen the way I had hoped. I was reminded on a trip to London that God loves me just as I am. (You can read that story here: How God Met Me in London) I hope that God meets you where you are. That He comforts you in your frustrations and pain.
Reflection Question:
What is stopping your productivity this week?
➡️ Didn’t see a relatable roadblock? – Stay tuned for my next post: Part 2
heartfelt thoughts of comfort for you:
As we navigate the roadblocks in our pursuit of productivity, it’s important to acknowledge the frustrations and burdens we carry. These moments of feeling stuck are an opportunity to pause and seek stillness, trusting that true rest and clarity come from a deeper place. The challenges we face—whether in our homes, our families, or our inboxes—are not beyond the reach of grace. Let us trust that we will be met with kindness right where we are, and that we have the strength to take small, meaningful steps forward. May we find the tools, support, and courage we need to create healthier rhythms and to move toward the peace and purpose we’re seeking.