From the time I was a teenager earning money for babysitting and doing summer jobs I have believed in saving and budgeting. However, this is probably my least favorite aspect of adult life. I often find it difficult to line up what I believe with my daily actions. I want my financial goals to match my spending.
Jim is amazing at handling our money and budgeting. Since our college days, we have made the choice to give first (we tithe to our church and other charities), save second (in different areas to prepare for the future) and we live on the rest (this helps us practice contentment and limits our spending). This has been our guiding method as we have gone through different seasons of life.
As we teach our teens how to manage their finances I am reminded of some specific things I have learned. Below I share some helpful tips that make living debt-free more possible.
Tip #1 – Have Business Meetings Often
As a married couple, we pay attention to our budget and do budget reviews. We work to be in agreement over what our next big purchase will be and how we will budget our expenses. We also try to compromise and be understanding about our different spending habits. Guilt and shame do not belong here. We try to just look at the numbers, make adjustments, and move forward.
We each look at our finances and expenses weekly at part of the Weekly Review process.
Here is a peek into my list: [ My Weekly Review & Bullet Journal Lists ]
- Budget, Expenses, Bills to Pay… you know all the fun money stuff.🙂
- Where am I at? What am I saving towards? What needs to be taken care of?
A few times a year we meet and do a full review of the budget and our expenses. These conversations help us be on the same page and headed in the same direction. We discuss what we have spent our money on, what extra expenses we are saving for, and how we want to change our spending in the next year.
By the end of our “business meeting,” we are in agreement with our schedule, commitments, small decisions, financial planning, and household projects.
This has created unity and consistency in our home.
Tip #2 – the Spending Freeze Challenge
This is a challenge that I have done a few times a year for the last 4 years. It has become a game changer for me. I gain so much clarity in that week of saying “No” to myself and my kids. I find areas that need to change or be adjusted.
What is it & How to do it:
- No spending money for a 7 full days. This does not include utilities and bills. This is just your typical weekly expenses: clothing, groceries, drive-thru meals, extra events, Target browsing.. etc.
- Do not create loopholes. Actually challenge yourself. Yes, this will be hard. That is the point. Be excited to find new ways to do things and make it work.
- Stay home as much as you can that week. Don’t tempt yourself. Give yourself a break and make it easier to stick to the spending freeze challenge.
- Use the saved money wisely. Set it aside. Put the money that you would normally spend on groceries and expenses that week into a separate place. (pay down debt, savings, travel budget, new furniture)
- When the freeze is over… spend as normal. Do not go crazy spending everything you saved. Be creative to solve things that are needed that week. Be scrappy and use what you have.
Why do I do this?? For the power of a reset. I am training myself to be creative, to go without, and to roll with the punches. If I am honest, I get into bad patterns with my spending. I have cabinets stocked with decent food. I have something in the bottom of the freezer that needs to be used up… and I buy things that I don’t really need. The spending freeze shakes me up and gives me fresh perspective.
I also explain to the kids why we are doing a Spending Freeze and then ask for their help that week. It is easier when they know what is happening and can adjust their expectations.
I originally found out about this idea from Jordan Paige here: https://funcheaporfree.com/how-to-do-a-spending-freeze/.
Tip #3 – Pay attention to what each meal costs
Do you know the cost of the meal you made last night for dinner?
Can you estimate how much your family’s favorite fast food will cost for a typical lunch?
What do you spend on food each week?
These were all questions that I was a bit oblivious to. This simple tip of paying attention to what each meal costs changed my grocery shopping. I shop with the mindset of meals and the ingredients for those meals. I buy ingredients only when I need them.
It also helps me to have a list of cheap go-to meals for “better than fast food”. I know I can make a meal at home in 15-20 minutes for less than $15. This removes the appeal of going through the drive-thru and saves me money. Our dinner experience is better too. When I make meals at home we sit around the table and talk instead of eating in the car on the way to the next thing. It is slower, healthier, more relational, and cheaper.
Here are some practical examples:
- Spaghetti: This cost us a total of $12.25 (in October 2022). A simple at home meal for my family of 6. It takes about 20 minutes to make and 3 of my kids can put this meal together easily on a busy week night.
- one box of spaghetti noodles = $1.99
- one jar of pasta sauce (Aldi’s brand) = $1.45
- one bag of frozen meatballs (approx. 20) = $5.79
- a French Baguette (Aldi’s bakery section) = $1.69
- a bag of garden salad = $1.29
- Chicken Enchilada Soup: This cost us a total of $14.79 (in October 2022). Another easy meal that we enjoy. It takes about 15 minutes to prep and put into the crockpot. This helps me on the evenings when I am driving kids to church small groups. Normally I do not write recipes, so here is my quick explanation.
- 3 boneless skinless chicken breasts = $6.35
- green enchilada sauce (1 large can) = $1.99
- canned tomatoes & green chilis = $0.85
- one onion (chopped) = $0.25
- one carton of chicken bone broth + 4 cups water = $3.40
- Combine all ingredients in the crock pot and cook for 4-6 hours.
- Before serving take out chicken thighs, dice the meat, and put back in the soup.
- Toppings for soup bowls: fresh cilantro, sour cream, avocado slices, cheese (if I have them)
- I serve it with a big bowl of tortilla chips as a side (one bag of chips from Aldi’s = $1.95)
**(All ingredients listed came from Aldi’s in Mesa,AZ. Food prices change all the time here is just a snapshot.)
- Fast Food: Usually a total of about $50. If we go to our favorite fast food place it costs us about $40-$50 for lunch or dinner. That is burgers and fries (or chicken sandwiches) for 6 people. Yikes! I feel sticker shock every time we go through the drive-thru. So we only go once week. It is a special treat and therefore does not radically affect our diet or our wallets.
I first encountered this idea of paying attention to meal costs as a newly married 20 year old. I read the book Miserly Moms (given to me by my mom). She knew that we were trying to finish college and money was very tight. I was surprised by some of the ideas in this little book and inspired to make some helpful changes.
The Book: Miserly Moms: Living Well on Less in a Tough Economy
If you are looking for delicious and practical recipes for families I highly recommend this blog: https://lovelylittlekitchen.com/ – Julie is helpful and excellent at sharing food that is easy to make.
Tip #4 – Be Kind to Yourself (and others)
Guilt and shame do not belong with money. Look at the numbers, make adjustments, and move forward. If emotions are coming up related to budgets, spending and money those need to be dug up and delt with. Probably with a professional counselor. The faster you can get to the bottom of those issues the better for you and your household. (Trust me on this one.)
We all have bad habits, negative examples, and influences on our spending. Do not fight against these things alone and in the dark. Drag them all out into the light and deal with them. Then heap kindness and grace on yourself as you make decisions and mistakes. Patterns are hard to break.
Be understanding about your different spending habits. Your spouse (and your teens) will have different spending goals. Leave room in the budget for different interests. Let your teens make mistakes and feel the consequences of those decisions. Separate financial issues from the relationship. I personally do not want my marriage defined by where our finances are at. Jim is excellent at this. He is gracious and kind when I go over budget (usually on home decor). And we work together to solve issues instead of against each other.
More Resources I have found helpful:
- The Minimal Mom – Dawn is encouraging, practical, and kind. I have been following her channel for years.
- Jordan Paige – Check out her YouTube channel for tons of creative ways to stretch your money.
- https://funcheaporfree.com/how-to-do-a-spending-freeze/.
- Here is another powerful and effective way to re-set your budget and weekly spending:
I often find it difficult to line up my financial goals to match my daily actions. Living in our culture of “more” and “right now” can be a struggle to say NO to ourselves and our kids.
We have to strategically make the choice to give first, save second, and live on the rest. I hope that these tips help you in your journey to living debt-free. Know that I am cheering you on! It is worth it! 😁😉
💙You’ve got this! – April
Photos by micheile dot com / roam in color / Katie Harp / and others on Unsplash
Check out this article on the blog:
How to Be Kind to my Future Self
- What can I do today that will help me tomorrow?
- How can we be kind to the future version of ourselves who is tired and worn out?
- How can we do the thinking right now so that we do not have to do that later?
I used to chastise myself for not running at the optimum level all the time. Like I was a robot or a computerized human. But I have learned that efficiency is not about running at top performance all the time. Plan and prepare now so that in the future you can just do the task.
Here are some very practical tips you can apply today…
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