This weekend I climbed a mountain. This was very significant for me for a lot of reasons, but first I want to mention that it has been a long time since I’ve been able to climb a mountain.
When you become a parent your limitations and the things that you can do are often determined by your children. So previous hikes we have taken have been stopped short by the capacity of our youngest child at the time. I have felt tied down and limited in what I can see and do.
Those adventures were still fun and meaningful in their own way, they were just different. Thankfully, for this hike, my dear friend offered to stay with the kids and let me go. This meant my only limits would be my own. And I was able to face them head-on.
The reason this climb was so significant to me was due to some news we had received a few days prior about my dad‘s health and fight with cancer. His treatment and journey will be long and painful to watch. And unfortunately, I am not new to watching a painful journey like this one take place.
As I went on that hike, as grueling as it was for me, out of shape and not used to such a challenge, I first needed to work out the pain of that news in my body. There is something about doing something physical to process emotions and stress.
Secondly, I needed to remind myself that I CAN persevere through hard things as I’ve done many times before. I CAN reach the top. I CAN keep going when it feels impossible. If I can climb that mountain, then I CAN climb the emotional mountain of watching my dad suffer from cancer.
There were many moments I didn’t think I would make it to the top and other moments I wasn’t sure I could make it back to camp. I felt like I was at my capacity and couldn’t keep going. I have felt that way recently with the new diagnosis.
I can’t watch my dad suffer anymore. I can’t go through one more hard health thing with him. I can’t. But just as I felt like I couldn’t get to the top of that mountain and did, I CAN keep taking one step at a time on this new part of my life journey.
Lastly, getting to the top of that mountain meant that there was something worth fighting for in this world. There is a view to be seen, joy to be had, places to explore and life to keep on living.
Sometimes it is difficult in the darkness to be able to see the light. The end of the trail is out of sight and I can begin to feel as though it will never end- that the beauty is gone and only rocks lie ahead. I needed to remember to keep living. Keep fighting. Keep taking one step further. It is worth it.
Along the hike my husband and I sort of kept each other going. Kept pushing each other a little further. This is a good reminder too that I don’t have to climb this mountain alone. That others walk alongside me.
Not only loved ones and friends but a God who has gone before me. He will help me when hope seems lost and provide a bit of shade, a rock to rest on, a cool breeze. I need to remember to watch for these moments. To not just focus on the end, the hard, the pain, but rather see the little blessings. Allow them to fill me up so I can take the next step and keep going.
I made it to the top of that mountain. I accomplished something I wasn’t sure I could. And I will take this next “mountain” one step at a time. I can do hard things in Christ who gives me strength.
- What hard things are happening in your life?
- What mountains are you facing right now?
- How can you focus on your next few steps?
- Who can you lean on to keep you going?
- Can you spend some time journaling about the little blessings that happen in the midst of the hard?
- How has God gone before you and provided for you?
“I know both how to make do with little, and I know how to make do with a lot. In any and all circumstances I have learned the secret of being content — whether well fed or hungry, whether in abundance or in need.
I am able to do all things through Him [Christ] who strengthens me.”
Philippians 4:12-13
Dear Lord,
Thank you for the special moments you give us in the midst of the hard. May we not miss them. Thank you for the ways you help us continue, even when it seems we can’t take another step. Give us the courage, the strength, and the peace, to persevere through whatever journey we find ourselves in. And thank you that we don’t walk alone.
Amen
I’m praying for you as you face whatever mountain you are climbing. You are not alone. – Erin
Erin Paige works in behavioral health. She has a master’s degree in professional counseling and has been working with mental health agencies for over 9 years. She is always pushing herself to be a better mom for her 2 girls and is a healthy well-rounded person. I am thankful for her friendship and excited that she was willing to share this hard personal story here.
Here are some other articles that Erin has helped with:
Pivot – A Change In Plans & The Speed of Personality – Transitions & Slowing Down
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